The Value Of Having Time Apart 

 

When people think of stress, they are more often than not thinking about themselves. Stress is something the individual feels, experiences and has to deal with. Also, stress is to what extent it affects the people around you, and its lasting adverse effects. 

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It’s especially important in the context of a marriage, where law binds two people and have a duty to raise their family and provide for their needs. That alone is a daunting task, and it becomes even more challenging as problems and stressors arise. 

 

In most societies, divorce or anything to that tune remains taboo. However, time apart in the sense of reestablishing one’s identity is entirely fair. There’s a healthy balance to having time apart as a couple to improve relationships and the wellbeing of the surrounding people. 

 

 What Is Time Apart 

The crucial thing to acknowledge here is that marital problems are completely natural. It’s a part of married life that couples must experience and resolve together. Time apart should never be a way to escape dealing with problems and let it become a band-aid solution that may or may not end well for couples in the long run. Time apart is giving the individual a chance to nourish their mind, body, and soul individually to encourage a lasting positive impact on the relationship. 

 

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What It Does For You 

Time apart allows the individual a chance to think. When stress comes about, it’s easy to become angry, irrational, and say things without genuinely thinking about it. There’s much value in getting a chance to stop and think because it’s the only way we evaluate ourselves and what we feel. It means being less irritated, appreciating things more, and radiating more positive energy. Another critical aspect of having time apart is that it allows the individual space to revisit their passions. 

 

Someone who rekindles with their passions and makes time for hobbies are proven to be in a much happier disposition than the average person. In the case of a marriage, you may need to break away from your partner and family and focus first on what makes you personally happy and inspired. The happy disposition you can get from being passionate will surely reflect well for the family. 

 

Who You Do It For 

Who exactly are these “surrounding people” we talk about? At the core of the family unit are the children. Parents everywhere strive to be the best they can be by providing the best and most comfortable and positive living situation for their children. They are the most significant reasons to maintain a healthy relationship between parents. 

 

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 Spending time apart doesn’t have to be the specific solution to keeping a healthy relationship. Explore the realities of your relationship and assess what will help bring it to its desired state. It could be time apart, counseling, a vacation, and there’s a world of options waiting. The message to keep in mind is that individuals need to take care of themselves to live in harmony with other people. 

 

 

 

6 De-Stressing Activities To Enjoy With Your Partner Today 

Being in a relationship is a very special experience. However, due to chaos in society, stress has become inevitable for everyone. Having a healthy lifestyle is even more important now, including personal holistic health and working on your relationships. According to licensed clinical social worker Jody Ford, “stress impacts our love relationships more than we are aware of or acknowledge.” 

 

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Stress is all around us–at work, at home, at school, maybe even at your local grocery store that has incomplete inventory. Because stress is unavoidable, the best solution is to accept it and help reduce stress levels by employing fun and stress-relieving activities. According to Dr. David Ballard, PSyD, ““When stress becomes chronic, this narrow focus continues for a long time and we have difficulty paying attention to other things.” There are a lot of stress-relieving activities that you and your loved one can do together. Below are six de-stressing activities you can enjoy with your partner today: 

 

  • Workout Together 

Doing physical activities is a great way to relieve stress. Engaging in blood-pumping exercise releases endorphins, which are hormones responsible for promoting good sleep and reducing stress. More so, there are different types of exercises you and your loved one can try even at the comforts of your own home. 

 

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  • Have A Quiet Dinner At Home 

Enjoy a home-cooked dinner without bringing your mobile phones and other devices on the table. The distractions provided by your devices can affect how you enjoy your meal. Without the presence of mobile phones and other devices, you and your loved one can enjoy an intimate dinner and reconnect with great conversation and quality time together. 

 

Tip from LeMel Firestone-Palerm, LMFT, LPCC, CGT: Beware of trashing your partner (with others or in your thoughts), avoid making negative comparisons of your partner with others, or nurturing resentments.

 

  • Play Some Board Games 

Put the board games out of the cupboard! Playing board games for a couple of hours is a great way to reduce stress and have fun with your partner. Connect and have quality time with your loved one by playing board games together. You can have an easy conversation while playing, and you can also laugh at each other’s funny moments during the game. 

 

  • Schedule A Staycation 

A vacation doesn’t have to be grand and done in the neighboring city or country. Most people think that a luxurious vacation is always a solution to forgetting stress for a while. In fact, there are some things you can explore right in your own town or city. Because a grand trip isn’t always possible, trying something new right in your own town or city can be a great way to reduce stress together. 

 

  • Have A Couples Massage 

Massages are a great way to relax your body and reduce stress levels. Doing it with your partner beside you can be a great way to relax together. A couples massage is a great way to relax and connect with your loved one. Forget the stresses of your days for a while and focus on relaxing with your partner.  

 

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  • Take A Long Walk Together 

Being in nature has a great effect on relaxing our minds and reducing stress levels. It’s also a great way to get the blood pumping in your body. Going for a walk together is a great way to improve you and your loved one’s moods. This is a great way to have quality time together and have a great conversation without the constant buzz of other distractions. 

 

You can also try couples therapy together. According to Margaret Wehrenberg, PsyD, “Psychotherapy can help sort out the cause, and that leads to the most effective treatment plan.”  

 

 

 

All The Possible Sources of Relationship Stress 

 

It may have felt like the best feeling in the world at the start, but every relationship usually goes through the phases of problems whether couples like it or not. However, problems and issues that always pop out and occupy each partner’s minds will result in relationship stress and are deemed unhealthy if left unresolved. 

 According to Simon Rego, PsyD, “We also know that the brain is very complex, so that many different neurotransmitters or ‘brain chemicals play a role in influencing, and being influenced by, our emotions.”

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If you’re having this kind of confusion in your relationship, then check out all these sources of stress that are possibly hindering you and your partner’s healthy romance. 

 

Financial Issues 

While money is a sensitive talk among people especially between a couple, financial experts still regard ignorance of money issues to be one of the leading culprits of stress in a relationship. Real couple accounts agree to this, and even they are suggesting that money should be talked about during the early phases of the relationship. 

 

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As a relationship goes deeper and deeper, couples will eventually share things – from basic household items to investments for the future. Thus, money will be significantly involved. Problems with finances, however, rise among partners if their perspectives are not considered by each other. Experts tell that women view money as security, while men take it as an indicator of self-esteem. Understanding each view is vital to set rules and limitations when it comes to joint spending and saving. 

 

Trust Issues 

It’s okay not to place too much confidence in your partner as a way of keeping your heart safe should things don’t go well. However, excessive mistrust may change the way your partner feel about your relationship. Too much lack of confidence in your romance may affect both your behavior and relationship with other people. 

 

Not having enough confidence in your partner is serious relationship stress in itself as your mind wanders and thoughts race every time your partner is not with you. Loss of physical intimacy may disappear, and irritable confrontation from having too much of this so-called trust issue can be damaging to both of you. 

 

Communication Problems 

Lack of communication can bring a lot of misunderstanding between partners.  Ignorance and inability to listen to each other’s feelings and opinions are also major factors significantly causing stress and strain in your relationship. 

 

Communication issues between the two of you may also stem from poor time management skills. Allot some time for you and your partner to talk about even the basics – the usual how are you, how was work, what are your plans, etc. Most importantly, tell your partner how much you love him/her, no matter how obvious it may be. 

 

Do not get distracted with your work, business or even social media accounts. According to Rachel O’Neill, Ph.D. LPCC-S, “It’s hard to step away from the constant cycle of news,” O’Neill said. “Whether you’re watching one of the 24 hour news channels on TV or you’re scrolling through one of the social media sites.” However, you have no choice but to do it.

 

Attitude 

The tension in a relationship can start from criticizing your partner. Comparing your partner or your relationship with others is not healthy and can be damaging to one’s mentality. Couples should be sensitive enough to their partner’s feelings. Keeping positive vibes and maintaining a positive outlook between you and your partner have long been identified as a solid foundation to make your relationship last longer. 

 

Physical Health 

Ignoring oneself can also affect your relationship. Being too conscious of your body by eating less, working overtime, and sleeping late most of the time can bring serious problems to your mental health and the way you cope with stress and tension. Learn to take care of you and your partner’s physical aspect by starting to manage the food you eat and your habits. 

 

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You and your partner may not notice that these factors are slowly eating your relationship and affect both your daily lives. It is essential that the above aspects and prospects are known so as it may pave the way to fix the causes of whatever it may be that is bugging both of you now. Practice open communication and start discussing this relationship stress for a happier, healthier and lasting relationship. 

You can also try to go to therapy sessions. At the same time, downloading mental health-related apps can also be a good option. According to Sal Raichbach, PsyD, LCSW, “such apps have the potential to reach people who would otherwise not receive help by removing the barriers to treatment.” 

Ways To Relieve Stress: Blogging

As opposed to what most people think, blogs are not only for commercial purposes. Other than being a platform for building your business brand or as a way of making money from promoting, reviewing, and advertising different products, blogging can also be a form of treatment or therapy for troubled and stressed minds.

Whether it is an exhausted mind from the things you deem you cannot control or even an unusual blue feeling from lots of pending work, blogging can be therapeutic in a lot of ways. No, it is not maintenance-heavy.

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As one of the ways to relieve stress, many people have turned to blogging. In what ways does it relieve stress? And is this one of the effective ways of alleviating stress? Read more about it here.

Blogging: Provides You With A Way To Express, To Be Free

  1. You Make Your Own Rules – Ease You Of Stress

Remember that in your blog, there are no boundaries and no limitations. You can write whatever you feel, whatever you want to say, whatever you wish to think in many ways possible without anyone restricting you to do so.

There are no boundaries and limitations. You can write whatever you feel, whatever you want to say, whatever you wish.
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As your own boss to your own space, having the freedom to write anything is one of the means to relieve stress and relax. Blogging acts like someone you can share the burden with. You can relieve all your problems and stress from your body and mind to your blog without any consequences. Furthermore, writing your problems and issues can make you focus and think of the possible solutions in an organized manner.

  1. Personality Development – Your Steps For Improvement

Blogging is your own stage and a platform to express yourself. Most of the time, you will feel the need to elaborate things that you specifically write if it’s an issue or a problem you are facing. As a result, it will deepen your opinions, and you will grow more critical about the possible scenarios in your life.

Moreover, talking to yourself about any topic that you want or comfortable writing about is an excellent avenue to hone your communication skills. Blogging is an effective activity not just to relieve stress but to unleash your creativity and thought-organization skills.

Blogging can also make you active on social media, which can help in improving your mood. According to Stephanie Smith, PsyD, “Social media can be a good adjunct to treatment, but not necessarily a replacement.”

  1. You Can Find Great Support From Visitors And Commenters

A lot of people who turned to blogging as a form of escape from reality have found a lot of positivity from their audience and commenters. If you think that there are lots of negativity from every aspect of your life, you would be surprised by the positive vibes and words of encouragement from those who comment on your blog.

A lot of people who turned to blogging as a form of escape from reality have found a lot of positivity from their audience and commenters. you would be surprised by the positive vibes and words of encouragement. Blogging acts like someone you can share the burden with. writing your problems and issues can make you focus and think of the possible solutions in an organized manner. blogging opens the blogger or writer to the outpouring support from online groups and people that share their own experiences and give advice.
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Some studies have shown that the online community has significantly improved the ways people look at their problems after they post it on their own blogs and allow their audience to comment on them. As opposed to the traditional diary, blogging opens the blogger or writer to the outpouring support from online groups and people that share their own experiences and give advice to troubled and stressed minds.

Similar to a counselor, blogging encourages you to open up and express your feelings freely, completely, and honestly. It is also an outlet for people to connect with each other as if in group therapy. With this, it is indeed a common misconception that blogging equates to profit and to an income-generating hobby that needs a lot of attention and demands many hours of writing.

Bonus tip from Shelby Harris, PsyD, “We encourage people to make their bedroom a sanctuary for sleep.”

Stressed Over Your Writing Job? Here’s What You Can Do

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Writing is one of my ultimate passions in life that I decided to embrace at the age of 16. I used to create articles for the school paper, join journalism competitions, and even prepare speeches for various people. Even though I slightly went on a different path when I decided to take up a bachelor’s degree in Chemistry at the university, writing never left my heart. So, when a door opened for me to return to my first love, I stepped right into it at once without looking back.

The journey from there, however, was honestly not the easiest. For sure, I loved writing more than anything, and it would bring me so much joy to see others read or learn from my work. The thing is, I chose to remain in the freelancing world in which everyone has to fight for their spot or be ready to take on multiple projects at once to make ends meet.

At first, it was still fun. I would proofread books on the side, write articles for two different clients, and beta-read for another author. When the first and last projects ended, I was left with writing jobs. To be specific, I had to write five or six articles every day, with the clients merely giving me a title and set of keywords. The more days went on, the more it felt like my ideas were running out. Then, one morning, I caught myself staring at a blank page for hours, unable to type even a single word even though a lot of thoughts were screaming in my head.

Yes, stressing over your writing job can happen, no matter how much you love it. It cost me a few clients in the past, but now I can share a few things I do to overcome stress when you are a writer.

Jamie Marich, Ph.D., LPCC-S, LICDC-CS, RMT said “Stress is the pattern of specific and nonspecific responses an organism makes to stimulus events that disturb its equilibrium and tax or exceed its ability to cope.”

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  1. Try To Sleep It Off

The first thing you should do is to force yourself to take a nap. Sleeping tends to recalibrate your brain and relax your body. When you wake up, therefore, you will ideally feel fresh ideas rushing in your mind.

Shelby Harris, PsyD said “The sleep environment is an important, but largely ignored, component of a good night’s sleep.”

 

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  1. Listen To Instrumental Songs

It helps to look for the instrumental versions of your favorite songs as well. Since you don’t hear words, you automatically feel the need to supply them. That will push your brain to start thinking coherently, which may lead to you coming up with things to write about.

  1. Get Your Pen And Paper

Using a computer or laptop is a necessity to get your work out there, but it can undoubtedly become a thought-blocker. The more you cannot express your ideas through words, the more you may feel too stressed out to function. During such desperate times, you should rely on a pen and paper so that technology cannot hinder your thoughts.

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Final Thoughts

Dealing with stress even when you are doing something you love is healthy. You are doing a lot of things at once by typing, doing research, thinking, and formulating words. You have to put yourself in the shoes of different people as well, especially if you need to appeal to various target markets. However, you should not let stress put out your passion for writing. Follow the tips mentioned above now. Good luck!

If you think writing is not enough, you can always consider getting fit. Dan Burris, MA LPCC LADC said “Exercise provides an excellent release of stress, increase of natural endorphins, mental and emotional well-being. It’s also a nice excuse to get away from the crowd and spend some peaceful time of self-care.”

Why It Pays Off To Relax Sometimes

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“You only live once.” That is a motto that practically every millennial swears by these days. It is the driving force behind every crazy activity they try or every adventure they take on. These people do not care much about owning a house or having a stable source of income. A lot of them merely stick to their jobs to fund the things they want to do. If someone offers to pay for every trip they go to, it is possible that they will not think twice before saying adios to their bosses and colleagues.

The thing is, such ideals are much different from what the generation before they follow. In their parents’ mind, everyone should keep on working hard to save for retirement. They frown upon young people who get their paycheck and blow it all at the mall or leisure trip. They are not fond of the YOLO movement either, which makes them think that kids nowadays are getting lazier by the minute.

If I can be honest, though, I would say that the members of the previous generation need to loosen up a little. To give a new twist to an old saying, all work, and no play does not make life worth living. The millennials may have to learn more about taking responsibility, but the adults should know how to relax sometimes as well because:

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  1. Stress Will Be A Staple In Your Life

Stress is essentially not bad from time to time. It means that you are doing something with your life; you are not waiting for others to do all the work for you. However, if you resist that vacation leave that your bosses are offering to you, stress may become the only constant thing in your life.

Carolyn Ferreira, PSyD suggests to repeat this to yourself daily: “May I be peaceful” or “a similar soothing word that works for [you], such as ‘happy,’ ‘calm’ or ‘safe.’”

  1. You Cannot Appreciate The Things Or People Around You

Focusing too much on your responsibilities makes you insensitive towards the people or things around you. You may say that you are not doing anything wrong, that you are working hard for everyone you love, but that’s no excuse to take a step back at times. This way, you can appreciate what – or who – you have in your life.

  1. You Deserve To Enjoy The Fruits Of Your Labor

Going on a short holiday with your loved ones does not have to break the bank, just in case that’s what’s stopping you from doing some recreation and relaxation. Lisa Kaplin, PsyD said “When we’re stressed, we tend to focus on everything that is going wrong, which makes it even harder to unwind.”

But take note that it is not terrible to splurge on yourself a bit, especially if you have been working nonstop in recent years. No one deserves to enjoy the money you have made more than yourself.

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In The End

Relaxing after completing a massive project or even working overtime is not a crime. It is essential, to be honest, for your sanity. If you drive yourself to the bone all the time, you will become a slave of your work. Unhappiness will soon come forth, and then you may end up not knowing who you have become. I can tell you now how scary that realization can feel, so you should not allow the situation to get too crazy.

Bonus fact about stress and anxiety from Dr. Deborah Khoshaba, PsyD: “Eating nutrient-deficient foods, not getting enough carbohydrates, protein or fat in your diet, or not eating enough can fluctuate blood-sugar levels that trigger anxiety.”

Stress Facts That You Don’t Want To Hear

 

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People say that you are not doing anything meaningful in life if you never feel stressed out. While that may be true, you should not feel the need to harbor as many sources of stress as possible to be able to claim that you are doing something relevant.

Jenev Caddell, PsyD said “While there are numerous ways to slow down and be more present, the key to cutting down the worry is remembering the importance of doing so.”

Otherwise, you experience the following results of stress that you undoubtedly do not want to hear.

1. It Makes You Ugly

No one can deny how much we all want to look fabulous in everyone’s eyes. The proof of that is the increasing number of makeup, whitening, or tanning products that get advertised in different media outlets every day. More aesthetic centers are popping up as well, considering people have a lot of features that they want to fix.

The thing is, no matter how many products you slap on your face and body, they will all end up useless if your stress level is taller than you. When you wipe off the cosmetics or get rid of the augmentations, you may still look old and ugly since stress can dry your skin, cause acne breakout, and produce wrinkles.

2. It Pushes Your Loved Ones Away

You cannot possibly be exposed to gamma radiation, but when you’re too stressed, you can quickly turn into Incredible Hulk with the slightest triggers. For instance, if your kid comes back in the house after playing outside and you see their dirty clothes, you may scold him or her for that. In case a colleague asks about the project you’re both working on, you bark at them to check it on their own.

Do you want to become an island that’s isolated by every living creature? It can happen if you don’t try to reduce your stress levels.

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3. It Causes You To Miss Opportunities

Stress can make your vision narrow, frankly speaking. You may be too busy at work to realize that there’s an email from another company that wants to offer you a higher salary and position, for example. Your friend may also want to set you up on a blind date with a fantastic guy, but you avoid it because you don’t have the time. The keys to the doors that open for you, therefore, end up getting picked up by other people.

Considering you don’t wish to miss opportunities in the future, do your best to lessen your sources of stress. Relax a bit after a long day; don’t take your work at home. Furthermore, if you have to, file for an indefinite leave of absence as well to find yourself again. This way, you will become alert enough to know when chances come your way.

Jenna Wierenga, PsyD said “Catastrophic thinking is pondering all the negative reasons why your date didn’t return your call right away.”

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Final Thoughts

Stress is not your best friend; it does not have your best interests at heart. You cannot be extremely happy or fulfilled as long as you are dealing with too much stress. Try to get rid of your stressors at some point or at least reduce their number to avoid seeing the facts mentioned above come to reality. For example, try to look for a hug from someone you love. According to Scott Bea, PsyD, “If you received a hug on a day that you had experienced some interpersonal conflict, the hug was actually a modifier of the stress response – meaning you had less of an increase in negative emotion, and less of a decrease in positive sentiment, if you got a simple hug.” Cheers!

Stressing Over Online Marketing? Here Are Tips To Use Pinterest Well

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Do you have a lot of DIY products that you wish to share or sell to the world, but you cannot decide how to do it more effectively?

That can understandably be enough to stress you out. Imagine, you know that your creations are much better than what consumers get in the market. However, they cannot see that because you have no idea how to promote them. Worse, it’s all you might think about, preventing you from coming up with other things that people might love.

There are two paths that you may take from here on out. The first one is the slow, traditional route, which consists of opening a physical store, going to malls or parks to send out flyers, or hanging banners on the streets to advertise your products. It is known to work well for many companies in the past, so you are free to give it a shot now, too.

The second path that many entrepreneurs recommend, though, is to use Pinterest for marketing purposes. This platform is similar to Instagram, in the sense that you can share photos here. Despite that, you may see it as your digital public gallery, showroom, and whatnot.

Below are a few ideas on how to start marketing with Pinterest and stop stressing over your online presence.

1. Create A Business Account

Apart from the fact that it makes things official, a Pinterest account that is specifically for business purposes offers a lot of beneficial tools to people, which can help them raise their sales through the social media channel. Among them are Analytics (to see engagement in your profile) and Rich Pins (which allow you to add information regarding the products).

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2. Generate High-Quality Images

Pinterest users ultimately visit the website because of the high-resolution pictures that can be found there. It is the reason why new entrepreneurs like yourself need to learn the right way of creating images for the site. Here are the basic rules to remember.

  • The photos have to be brighter or lighter in color.
  • They should not be blurred or lopsided.
  • The images can do much better if and when the model’s face is not showing, considering you are not selling cosmetic goods.

3. Make Them Shareable

This social networking channel lets users customize the pictures according to how they want it to appear to the consumers. You can do with or without a Rich Pin, for instance. Still, it is more advisable if you make one since it will allow the viewers to share the image on their account and become seen by their followers.

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4. Connect Your Pinterest To Your Other Social Media Accounts

It does not make you greedy if you promote your new Pinterest page through your Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other accounts. It makes you a smart entrepreneur because you may have friends there who do not know you’re already pinning amazing photos on Pinterest. By sharing your page on different platforms, therefore, you can get more people to check out your boards.

 

Once you have all the products, photos, and content ready, do everything mentioned above from top to bottom to begin marketing – and perhaps even earning – through Pinterest. Good luck!

 

Healthy Ways To Avoid Needing A Therapist Post-Separation

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Ending your relationship with your spouse of many years can only be different, but a therapist once told me that sometimes it’s necessary. After all, not every woman in the real world lives like the ones in fairy tales, who get pampered, loved, and honored by their husbands. At the same time, not all men are seen as Prince Charming-material by their wives because they either cheat on them or harbor too many vices. When there are no longer petty quarrels but full-on yelling match in the house for months on end, it is often better to accept that separation is key to a peaceful life.

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